My son is 5 this year. He understands us and he knows what we expect from him. Sometimes he is an angel and does exactly everything he is told to. But most times, like today when he simply refuses to take instructions, I wonder where I went wrong as a parent. Am I doing this whole motherhood thing the best way possible?
My younger boy is 2 this year and he may be small but he can be very territorial, opinionated and stubborn. He is 2 and is seeking independence. He realises he no longer needs to listen to us and can do exactly what he wants.
Have one more carrot Baby? No I think I’ll toss it on the floor, right where the other vegetables are.
Can we sleep now, Nathen? No I want to keep running around and play with my trains.
Can you wait please? NOPE. I WANT IT NOW.
Mayhem in the house
Every day, in one small way or another, my sons will fight over the smallest things and over everything. Thankfully my elder boy isn’t malicious or violent. He’s a sweetheart who wouldn’t lift a finger to hurt his younger brother. But bless his playful heart, he sure does love annoying the crap out of his brother.
My younger boy takes no nonsense. If he sees something, he wants it, and it’s his. Doesn’t matter who it belongs to. If something is in his line of sight, it’s unquestionably HIS.
If my husband or I take our eyes off them for just a minute, they’ll be on the floor tugging and snatching something from each other. I often feel like a screaming tyrant, and one of them will most definitely end up crying either from getting hurt or not getting what he wanted.
Between all the crying and yelling in the house, I live in constant fear that my neighbours hate us for all the noise they must surely hear. That is my reality but you won’t see it anywhere on my social channels.
When the boys behave, I feel rather proud of myself. It feels like I’m doing all the right things as a parent. But more often than not, when they push past my very last button for the hundredth time in a single night, I’m not sure if I’m fit to be their mom.
“But that’s just what kids do!”
A friend and fellow mom said these wise words. Sometimes, no matter what you do, your kids are going to be complete douchebags. It is their nature to test your limits and push all boundaries set for them.
This too, shall pass. You will get a fresh perspective and renewed patience in a day, maybe two. But until then, remember that your kids are NOT bad for life and you are not an unfit mother.
Motherhood: Sometimes the goal is just to keep your kids alive
With the perfect images of motherhood that are often portrayed on social media these days, it’s sometimes hard to remember than the goal isn’t perfection. We sometimes forget life itself is not perfection.
Perhaps the goal isn’t to be a calm, cool, collected, fashionable mom with a happy baby. Sometimes, on some days, the goal is just to keep everyone alive. And that doesn’t make you or me an unfit mom. That just makes all of us normal, and human. :)
Hang in there fellow moms, clear skies will come after every dark storm. It will be worth it.